Okay, real talk, choosing the right financial planner feels exactly like swiping on dating apps at 2 a.m. in my Brooklyn apartment while eating cold pizza and stressing about credit-card debt. I’m sitting here right now in December 2025, heater clanking like it’s about to die, Christmas lights half-burnt out, and my rescue pitbull snoring on my feet. And yeah, I still get heart palpitations thinking about the first “financial advisor” I ever hired. https://www.cfp.net/
That dude wore too much cologne, called me “buddy” 47 times in one meeting, and tried to sell me whole life insurance like it was the second coming. I walked out $8,000 lighter and with a policy I canceled six months later. So when I say I’ve got scars from trying to choose the right financial planner, I mean literal emotional scars, okay?https://www.napfa.org/
Why Most People (Including Past-Me) Choose the Wrong Financial Planner
Past-me thought “financial planner” just meant “smart person with spreadsheets.” Nope. There’s commission-hungry wolves, there’s fee-only angels, there’s robo-advisor weirdos, and then there’s the guy who only takes clients with $5 million net worth and judges your shoes. I once sat in a glass office in Midtown Manhattan wearing scuffed Vans while some bro in Tom Ford loafers explained why I “wasn’t ready” for his services. Bruh.https://www.feeonlynetwork.com/
Here’s the dirty truth I learned the hard way:
- Some planners get kickbacks for pushing certain products
- Some only care if you already have money (spoiler: I didn’t)
- Some are fiduciaries (legally required to put your interests first) and some… aren’t
My Current Checklist When I Choose the Right Financial Planner (Tested in the Wild)
I now have this stupidly specific checklist taped inside my planner (yes, I have a paper planner, fight me). These are the exact questions I ask on the first call, usually while pacing my living room tripping over dog toys:
- Are you a fiduciary 100% of the time? (If they hesitate, I hang up.)
- How do you get paid? (Fee-only >>> commission-based, for me at least)
- Can you show me a real client example similar to my messy situation? (Divorced at 34 with student loans and a side-hustle dream)
- Do you manage money yourself or outsource it?
- What’s the minimum you usually take? (Some will say zero now, bless 2025)
Ask them to send you their Form ADV and Form CRS, then actually read it. I do it over coffee at this little Albanian place near me, feel fancy and paranoid at the same time.https://www.xyplanningnetwork.com/
The Most Embarrassing Financial Planner Meeting I Ever Had
Picture this: I show up to some guy’s office in 2022, super proud of myself for “adulting.” 15 minutes in, he asks me how much I have invested. I’m like “$23,000 in a Vanguard and $9,742 in a savings account that I constantly drain on seed oils and coffee.” He actually pulled out his phone and called the receptionist to “see if he could give me 30 minutes, maybe we’ll have to reschedule.” I told him to get fucked, walked out, cried in the elevator.https://www.letsmakeaplan.org/
Went home, ordered Thai food, told my friend Jen all about it on Marco Polo. The next week I found my current fee-only planner who literally said, “I’ve seen way worse, let’s fix this.” I cried again. He’s awesome.
How to Choose the Right Financial Planner in 2025
2025 is wild. We’ve got AI planners, virtual-first firms, and TikTok “Fin-fluencers” who are more concerned with going viral than the SEC. So here’s the equation that’s working for this 38-year-old chaos muppet:
- Fee-only + Fiduciary + CFP + Can explain index funds in five minutes without condescending + No photo of them and their Lambo on Instagram.
What I’m Doing Right Now to Choose the Right Financial Planner (Again)
I’m switching planners again (because my current one is moving to Portugal, all the good ones always leave NY), and I’ve narrowed it down to three:
- A solo fiduciary who charges $2,400 a year (expensive but worth it)
- A flat-fee virtual firm at $600 a year
- A “comprehensive” firm that wants 1% on AUM (1% of $150k is $1,500/year, so same price as #1 but less holistic)
I ballparked it to eight nearby planners, and honestly? Talking to them on the phone felt like dating again. One was pressured-sounding. One was “whale thar she blows” and they both got crossed off.
The Surprisingly Emotional Side of Choosing a Good Financial Planner
Nobody talks about how a good financial planner makes you feel like…seen. Like your financial planner looked at my spreadsheet (which I made in Google Sheets with columns labeled “f me” and “money for therapy”) and said “I’ve literally seen it all before, no judgment.”
The money stuff? It all works out. The emotional stuff? That’s where the magic is.
Also, I found a planner who lets me text him a photo of a meme about fee-only planners and replies “lol” — he gets a 10/10.
What’s Your Blind Spot?
I’ve moved past the “choose the right financial planner” to “make sure the right financial planner doesn’t fire YOU.”
I was using the first one for 2 years, and he was great, but I realized he was charging us nearly 1% percent on AUM and all AUM wants to grow. I was like “Hey, I found two financial advisors charging flat fees, and one of them has a much better user interface.” We did the math, and I’m saving $3,600/year.https://www.kitces.com/
The Financial Planner Decision Framework I’m Using in 2025
| Factor | Bad Fit | Good Fit | My Current Pick |
|---|---|---|---|
| Fee Structure | % of AUM, commissions | Fee-only or flat fee | Flat fee only |
| Fiduciary | Not willing to commit | 100% Fiduciary | 100% Fiduciary |
| Example Client | Only millionaires | Similar to me | Similar to me |
| Wow factor | Only in-person | Remote OK | Remote OK |
| Fee Comparison | 1.00% on AUM | $525–$5,500/year for comprehensive planning | $525/year (no AUM) |
So, how do you choose the right financial planner? It depends on your goals and preferences.
Seriously, talk to five, get fee quotes, and see who makes you feel like an idiot for not doing it sooner. If they’re good at choosing the right financial planner, they’ll make you feel like a genius for doing it now.
Hope this helps! I’m selecting my guy today — fingers crossed he doesn’t read this and price gouge me haha.
Drop your questions or horror stories in the comments — I read them all!
P.S. If you’re not joking, $500/year comprehensive financial planning? That’s $41/month. $42/month. Money isn’t cool, but as 2025, it’s a phone call away — with your financial planner.
